calorie-bomb smoothies

the truth? they don't drink those things every day AND stay that slim.

 I'm often asked, "What are you?" Now, there are plenty of interesting (and hilarious) ways to answer such an open-ended question, but the general context of this question usually infers that the asker is wondering,

"What sort of diet 'camp' do you fall into?"

The truth is, I don't have an answer to this question. I make no attempt to hide my preference for a largely grain-free existence - starches, grains and sugars have always bothered my stomach and affected my absorption of vitamins and

I eat everything but mostly prefer the texture of, well, food.

minerals. I don't eat sweets very often, although I have been known to inhale potato chips at a speed not unlike that of a champion pie-eater. I have never been a milk-drinker, though I do enjoy cottage cheese and natural yogurt. Having just said all this, I should admit that I consumed, within the past half-hour, a Starbucks spinach-&-feta wrap. Grains: check. Dairy: check. Processed: check. Best option given what I could find at Starbucks? Check.

So, you see, it's all about balance. I am not Paleo, I am not gluten-free, I am (definitely) not vegan. I don't buy ALL organic. I don't sprout my own mung beans. I try to eat well, and I listen to my body for feedback.

Sometimes, when solid food is not available, I have been known to whip up a protein shake. But you won't find me at the local smoothie shop. I don't TRUST those people. If it smells like a milkshake, tastes like a milkshake, and looks like a milkshake - it's a milkshake. Also, I don't like paying $8 for  a milkshake.

From one of my favourite sites, - the sugar content (yikes!) and bacon equivalents of some common smoothie recipes.

[Tweet "What's the BE (bacon equivalent) of your favourite "healthy" smoothie?..."]

You might be surprised! I'd rather eat 8 strips of bacon than drink a smoothie, anyway...

Drink Serving Size Calories Carbs (g) Sugar (g) Bacon Equivalent
Smoothie King – “Caribbean Way” Small (20 oz) 395 97 89 8 strips
Jamba Juice – “Mega Mango” Original (24 oz) 340 85 78 7 strips
McDonald’s Wild Berry Medium (22 oz) 310 71 67 6 strips
Burger King Tropical Mango Medium (22 oz) 330 78 63 6.5 strips
Sonic ‘Real Fruit’ Strawberry Slush Large (24 oz) 440 117 116 9 strips
Naked Juice “Green Machine” 1 Bottle(16 oz) 280 66 56 5.8 strips
Naked Juice “Probiotic Machine” 1 Bottle (16 oz) 360 86 78 7.4 strips
Odwalla “Tropical Energy” 1 Bottle (12 oz) 240 59 44 5 strips
Odwalla Carrot Juice 1 Bottle (12 oz) 100 22 19 3 strips
Vita Coco Coconut water 1 Bottle (16 oz) 90 22 22 3 strips
Your Blender “Green Juice” - 1 cup kale (3 Large leaves),1 cup green grapes(28 grapes), 1 cucumber, 1 Granny Smith apple Full Recipe (16 oz) 220 54 42 4.5 strips
Your Blender “Detox Drink” -         1 medium size beet, 4 medium size carrots, 1 medium apple, 2 T chopped fresh ginger Full Recipe (16 oz) 310 74 62 6 strips